Now Reading
Panel Voices: Why has it been difficult to keep a lesbian bar open long–term in Denver?

Panel Voices: Why has it been difficult to keep a lesbian bar open long–term in Denver?

Photo by Charles Broshous

Dede Frain, Jody Bouffard, Ching-yuan Hu and George Gramer weigh in on this week’s question. 


Dede Frain
Dede Frain

Dede Frain

I could write a book on this topic.

I think it’s probably because lesbians tend to “nest” more than men, so when they meet someone and U-Haul it, they tend to stay home much more.

Many lesbians also socialize with a small group of friends (especially when they are partnered) and look for activities outside of the bar scene. Single women often tell me they are uncomfortable going into bars and clubs by themselves and instead seek opportunities via groups that focus on activities or shared interests.

Without generalizing too much, many lesbians – particularly those in their late ’30s and beyond, perceive the bars as hook-up scenes rather than places where they can have meaningful conversations that might evolve into a relationship.

I have been in Denver since 1977 and I have seen more than 12 women’s bars close. And in my view, guys go out more and apps like Grindr – afford them numerous opportunities for easy hook-ups.

I don’t think many would argue that men are more comfortable with casual sex where as lesbians are often looking for relationships.

I think men are socialized to be more assertive, and this is not unique to Denver either. With few exceptions, even larger cities struggle to maintain successful lesbian bars.

Someone should write a dissertation on the topic and the rest of us could debate the issue over cocktails at a nice local lesbian bar.

Dede Frain is the CEO and founder of BAD, BabesArounDenver.com.


Jody Bouffard
Jody Bouffard

Jody Bouffard

I’ve been working in the bar scene my entire adult life, from helping run them to owning and operating four. Catering to women is a part of my DNA. And if I didn’t do it, who would?

I helped open and run my first bar in 2000: The Wave, which catered to gays and lesbians.

Since then I’ve opened tHERe coffee bar and lounge, HER Bar and my latest venture: Blush & Blu. As one of the only long-term lesbian bar owners in Denver, I know how difficult it can be to create synchronization for such a diverse community.

The bar business – gay or straight – is hard. The most difficult part in maintaining a lesbian–centric bar has been trying to please all of the clientele. I’ve seen women segregate into cliques, a trend I’m trying to dismantle. I am proud to offer a place where everyone feels welcome, but that dream isn’t always realized, by myself or the community at large.

This business is the hardest when I lose support. How do I then create a space women will want to be a part of again? I’m not a mind–reader, I’m doing what I do because I believe in camaraderie.

As a bar owner, I’ve been invited into peoples’ lives and get to share in the ebb and flow of a universal tie.

I don’t think it’s a lost cause to run a successful lesbian bar, but I do know that it takes a village. If we band together, the lesbian bar can be a successful mainstay. I am looking forward to that day.

Jody Bouffard is the owner of Blush & Blu, 1526 E. Colfax, BlushBluBar.com.


Chin-yuan Hu
Ching-yuan Hu

Ching-yuan Hu

There are fewer LGBT bar/club establishments that cater to women because there a number of false assumptions about the lesbian community – namely that we don’t go out as much, don’t have the disposable income commensurate with the men, etc – that simply aren’t true.

Even worse, a “women’s bar” has been an afterthought in the LGBT bar scene, thus not giving women the opportunity to frequent a quality establishment catering to our community.

At eden, we are reversing these false assumptions by providing a hospitality and entertainment venue run by lesbians for lesbians, and rather than finding it difficult to sustain a long-term lesbian bar, we are seeing the LGBT women’s community embrace us on a nightly basis.

In addition, while we strive to focus our menu, drinks, and entertainment towards lesbians and women in general, everyone is truly welcome at eden.

Next time you are in, please ask for me and I would love to give you a tour of our full venue!

Ching-yuan Hu has been General Manager at eden, a women’s bar that opened in June of 2011, for the last year and eden has been growing and expanding hours to better serve the community. More info at EdenBarDenver.com.


George Gramer
George Gramer

George Gramer

I am clearly not a lesbian, and I’ve never been to a lesbian bar, but am always am up for a challenging question – the answer to this is cultural, social, and economic.

For starts, gay men go out to bars, they like to drink, and they bring their friends. I believe that lesbians are much more likely to spend quieter time together, whether in small or larger groups. Bottom line: gay men generate far more revenue.

Women (both lesbian and straight) definitely go to gay bars, but men (whether straight or gay) are far less likely to go to a lesbian bar.

Several panel discussions ago, LGBT poverty was the subject. Lesbian couples have a significantly higher poverty rate than gay couples and heterosexual couples. Less disposable income means less time out in restaurants and bars of any kind.

Laura Douglas-Brown wrote in the GAVoice (Atlanta) that “bars don’t play the same role for lesbians in coming out and socializing that they do for gay men.” Maybe her comment reflects the more social nature of gay men.

In 2013, lesbians can go out anywhere and probably feel comfortable in their skin. Gay men perhaps prefer being out and about in a gay setting where they can enjoy the experience yet still feel secure.

All said, if someone invites me for a drink in a lesbian bar, I’ll be there.

Iowa native George K. Gramer, Jr. is the president of the Colorado Log Cabin Republicans.

What's Your Reaction?
Excited
0
Happy
0
In Love
0
Not Sure
0
Silly
0
Scroll To Top