Ask the Sexpert: A Feast of Toys

Dear Shanna,

There are so many options when it comes to sex toys and the materials of which they are made. Are all sex toy materials pretty much the same, or is there some hierarchy I should know about?

— Searching for the Ideal Sex Toy Material, Westminster.

Dear Searching,

Sex toys are a bit like food: They’re made out of all sorts of different ingredients/materials, and the better quality, the more it costs (but is usually worth it in the end). I mean, really, do you want to be putting the sex-toy equivalent of Micky D’s in your vagina or ass? I hope that while your gateway vibe or butt plug may be on par with a Whopper, you’re really to splurge a little for your bits below to give them the quality of sex toys they deserve.

The FDA does not regulate sex toys. At all. This means that packaging can literally say whatever, without being verified, and that toys can contain materials untested on human bodies. Take “jelly” for example … that soft, squishy, somewhat transparent material used on low-to-mid range vibes — yes, like the pink rabbit vibrator in “Sex and the City.” Sometimes referred to by nicknames like Sil-A-Gel, Gelee, Jellie, etc., this material is a type of jelly rubber that uses phthalates (a type of rubber softener) to give it the squish factor. Phthalates are the same materials that soften shower curtains and cheap children’s toys … and that usually result in a funky odor for a bit. With shower curtains, you let them air out, and the phthalates float off into the air. With sex toys, guess where those nasty buggers are leeching? Yup. Your body. The few studies out there show that phthalates can cause anything from irritations and allergic reactions to even cancer in some cases. The FDA doesn’t care, it seems, and companies don’t usually take the time to do this type of research. These will melt in heat, and some will even pick up ink on newspaper if placed there, or leave icky marks on furniture. Basically, if you MUST use jelly toys, PLEASE condom them up or, if you can, trade them in for the sex-toy equivalent of rainbow carrots, truffled gnocchi, or a fresh-caught trout.

So what are the high mucky muck materials of sexiness? 100 percent medical-grade or food-grade silicone is always a good deal (found with companies like Tantus, Lelo, Jimmyjane, JeJoue, Happy Valley, Fun Factory, and Vixen Creations), as is glass (like Pyrexions, Crystal Delights, and Fucking Sculptures), ceramic (Goldfrau, Shiri Zinn, and Lover’s Choice), metal (Njoy, Tantus), corian (1211 Kink), and even polyurethane-coated wood (NobEssence). These materials are completely body-friendly, and toys made of silicone, metal, glass, ceramic, and corian can even be sterilized for use with multiple people. Most of these toys will last a good long time, and some even come with warranties!

Of course, there is the middle range, too. Hard plastic is fine for use, but you shouldn’t be sharing these. Ditto with TPR and elastomer — these are both softer materials that are cheaper than silicone, but are phthalate-free and safe for use in your body. That being said, they also cannot be sterilized, so are good one person/monogamous folks’ toys, or should be used with condoms over them.

— Shanna.