Alexus Vain: The Villainess Valet of Colorado Pro-Wrestling

Professional wrestling isn’t exactly the queerest of spaces. It’s a place for straight boys to learn gender norms through the soap-opera drama of faces* and heels* tumbling in a mess of spandex, muscle, smack talk, clotheslines, body slams, jeers, cheers, and groans. Then again — don’t all of these elements belong in a quality drag show?

Enter: Alexus Vain, the only out pro-wrestling performer in Colorado. She wears a seductive gown, a pile of hair, luscious makeup, and a wicked grin. “If Mae West from Myra Breckinridge and the Evil Queen from Snow White had a child,” she says, “that’s Alexus Vain … I never appear in the same clothes twice in one night.”

Alexus was drawn to the women of wrestling from a young age: “I always loved the valets,* but what made me want to become one was Sensational Sherri Martel. She was over the top, wearing exotic eye makeup — spider webs or starburst over her eyes — and I thought, ‘I want to do that!’”

When she began five years ago, Alexus had a moment’s hesitation (“Let’s face it, wrestling is more of a straight industry”), but she resolved, “It can’t be any worse than other bitchy drag queens, and I had done that for 10 years, so I wasn’t afraid.”

Though her character differs slightly at her two promotions,* she prefers playing the villain: “It’s more fun. If you’re doing drag, and people hate what you’re doing, you’re petrified; whereas, if people hate what you’re doing in wrestling, it’s empowering. I feel the most energized when the fans yell at me, when they yell at the ref, when they call me names. If they’re talking about me, be it good or bad, at least they’re talking about me.”

Her misdeeds? “I hand my wrestler a roll of pennies to hit the other guy. They only get a roll of pennies because they ain’t even worth 50 cents. I choke opposing wrestlers on the rope if I have to. I scratch their backs and poke them in the eyes. Once, I showed my boobs to the referee to distract him. I get away with things that straight women would never do.”

And in a sea of testosterone, Alexus connects most with straight women after the show. “The women and little girls come to see me. I come out four times, and I always change my outfit. Women will come up and ask, ‘Where do you get your clothes?’ A little girl came up to me once after a show and said, ‘Can I tell you something?’ And I said, ‘Sure,’ and she said, ‘You’re so beautiful.’ Then she said, ‘Can I tell you something else?’ and I said, ‘Sure,’ and she said, ‘You look just like that Miss Piggy on TV.’ And I thought, to her, that’s glamorous. I’ll take it. I’ve been called much worse.”

Face a cheerworthy hero

Heel a boo-able villain

Valet a female manager of a wrestler or wrestling team

Promotions a business that hosts regular wrestling events