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radioactive vision

And the award goes to …

A friend once told me, if you live long enough, you’re bound to get an award for something. I was reminded of this when Mr. Waste and I attended the eighth a...

Heal thyself, animal doctor

“I was driving to Springfield, Missouri with a gay zookeeper and an elephant from Denver. An elephant named Dolly. An elephant that would later attack me.” S...

Naked sweaty balls

I was jumping up and down in the Ellie Caulkins Opera House. In the women’s restroom. Naked. While Swan Lake was playing on the stage. Most people would have...

Zippers or snaps?

Mr. Waste and I love to host dinner parties at our house. I cook and he cleans. I feel like I have the better end of the deal. And so does he. I make a mess and...