Now Reading
Wear Your Protester Blinders (and Sunblock)

Wear Your Protester Blinders (and Sunblock)

With Denver throwing one of the largest, badass Pride festivals in the US, the popularity of our city’s sassy and salacious shenanigans have always attracted detractors.

I remember seeing protesters for the first time back when I was a wee-little gay lad. There was a bearded man standing steadfast and irate at steps of the Cathedral Basilica of the Immaculate Conception on Crackfax (Colfax). He wore a bright-red ball cap with an embroidered white cross, holding a video camera with one hand. In the other hand he held a sign that read (in some sloppy handwriting): “Homosexuality is a sin.”

He was surrounded by a smattering of his supporters all holding similar signs, their faces locked in a permanent expression of “righteous” indignation and judgment.

Of course at first I was angry. F*cking pissed, actually. My life as a teenager was filled with indignant doomsayers just like that bright-red-ball-cap protester guy, vomiting their wordy bile of derision and condemnation for the LGBT community.

I met way too many deacons and preachers in my youth that fervently heaved hate onto others. And as a kid, they made me feel small and undeserving of love. Over and over the mantra would be recited: “Gays will be cast into a lake of fire for all of eternity, and our own laments will be drowned out by the screaming and wailing and gnashing of teeth!” (In all fairness, I’ve been to a few parties like that.)

That day, I almost confronted the Bible thumper and his sycophants when I realized what a huge mistake that would be.

Protesters at Pride are there to do only one thing: create conflict. There is no magical string of words you or anyone else could assemble that would make them change their minds and say, “Holy sh*t, you’re right! I’m being kind of a douchenozzle here, using religion as an excuse to justify my hatred of homosexuals, hiding behind the Bible like a coward as I shout ‘sinners’ into a megaphone at people I’ve never met.”

Not going to happen. Reason and empathy have been banished from the brain of bright-red-ball-cap protester guy.

That same day I witnessed a young lady step out from the parade, arguing with the throng of protesters while shoving her index finger at their chests. Though I couldn’t hear what was being said (shouted), the violent verbal exchange quickly got contentious.

I tip my hat to her courage, standing up against these “virtuous” bullies all by herself. But this poor woman, who should have just been enjoying that gorgeous summer day at Denver’s PrideFest, was now red-faced and almost in tears, battling it out with intolerant, unsympathetic protesters.

And that is exactly what the protesters wanted, to bulldoze someone’s joy. To make us feel small. To deprive our community of the happiness we f*cking deserve.

Don’t waste your time or your breath; they’ll never change perspectives in a single afternoon. In the words of the immortal Bronn, “There’s no cure for being a c*nt.” And with our constitutionally guaranteed freedom of speech, those protesters certainly have a right to be as c*ntastic as they like.

So for this year’s Pride, don’t forget to wear your sunblock, and don’t let these assholes ruin what should be a day of celebration with friends and family; a day of solidarity and exuberance for our community; and a day of lots of hot, sweaty sex.

What's Your Reaction?
Excited
0
Happy
0
In Love
0
Not Sure
0
Silly
0
Scroll To Top