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Heinzesight: When Life is a Bully

Heinzesight: When Life is a Bully

Heinzesight

There are so many times when I think my life is more difficult than most other people. I really don’t know what to do when situations get rough, and I want to give up trying to make things better. What suggestions do you have to help someone who is struggling with feeling this frustrated?

Life definitely has the potential to feel like a series of difficult or insurmountable tasks for each of us to conquer. It’s equally not uncommon to feel beat up by these circumstances to the point that we risk feeling like giving up on struggling to make situations work out for us. Worse than having to put a significant amount of effort into a series of tasks, we risk seeing these opportunities for success to be a game that is impossible to win or a bully that we cannot potentially beat. Regardless of what analogy we use, the feelings of powerlessness and hopelessness are dangerous ones to experience due to the de-motivational impact they may bring into our lives.

There is no doubt that life can sometimes feel like a bully, but instead of just feeling like its sole purpose is to beat you down, consider different ways you can work to be more successful during your engagement. Life is most assuredly a game, and the better player you are, the more successful you should become. Although there are multiple methods to improve your chances of kicking ass, each one of these comes with their own set of unique tasks for them to be effective.

Related article: Heinzesight- Protection and Healing from Toxic People 

It is most important to think through what you want to accomplish, how best to gain what you want, and how successful you think your methods will be. If you are feeling that your life is currently being a bully, consider a few of the most effective ways to deal with a bully on the playground.

Avoid   This passive way of not having to face something doesn’t necessarily help you fix a problem or conquer a challenge, but it can give you time to evaluate potential options you may have in order to actually be able to become more successful during your interactions. There are times when it is not only safer, but also smarter, to take yourself out of an environment that is dangerous, frustrating, or combative to create some space to look at a situation more calmly and objectively.

Of course, you may risk becoming increasingly stagnant and disengaged from actually doing something to make your situation better. There are times when we become too comfortable with hiding from or avoiding something that it is more difficult to decide to start thinking about ways to get back in the game. There are also only so many places we can run and hide from certain monsters before we run out of options and then would have to face them.

Ignore   There are times when you can adopt the “out of sight, out of mind” philosophy and attempt to convince yourself that something isn’t bugging you. Unfortunately, the reality is that these types of frustrations continue to impact us in negative ways even if we make attempts to put on blinders and tell ourselves they don’t exist. Much like avoiding situations, ignoring them can work in the short-term, but rarely is this method of disengagement helpful in making you feel better and more confident about the life you are leading.

There are some situations that may reconcile themselves on their own without your attempts to change them, but usually, this is not the case. Ignoring situations like hurt feelings, health concerns, or time-limited activities can actually be extremely harmful and cause devastating effects.

Confront   This is the most assertive way of engaging with something challenging. It doesn’t matter if it is a situation or person; standing up for yourself shows confidence and has the potential to be the most successful way of engagement. It is neither passive nor aggressive in its approach, and it does not have to include getting angry, upset, or violent. This is simply a way to help you not feel that you are powerless to cause situations to improve.

There are infinite possibilities to accomplish these efforts assertively. There are times to be nice, direct, firm, flexible, or simply put your foot down about not taking crap anymore. Although we do not always have the ability to make things happen exactly how we desire, there are absolutely ways to have some impact on the outcomes. You may just have to work on accepting that your efforts will not produce the perfect result, but it is better than it would have been if nothing had been done.

Related article: Heinzesight- Another Brick in the Wall 

Attack   It’s time to put on that armor; grab your shield and sword; gather up your strength, and get ready for battle. There are absolutely some situations that need a sharp tongue, firm hand, and a fight that you will not back down from. In these scenarios, defeat may be a possibility, but not without a fight. At least if you are laying there exhausted and defeated, you can take pride in knowing that you fought your hardest, and that you will live to fight another day. There is nothing wrong with losing a battle when you position yourself to win the war. Learn from your mistakes, and change up your plan to include updated strategies based on the new information you have gained from fighting. Don’t give up. Victory could be around the corner.

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