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Ask a Slut: The Denver Cycle Sluts Weigh in on Cannabis

Ask a Slut: The Denver Cycle Sluts Weigh in on Cannabis

They’re back! After a short hiatus from the pages of OUT FRONT, the Denver Cycle Sluts are back to answer your questions and offer advice on how to navigate Denver’s queer scene.

Just in time for 420, the Cycle sluts have generously answered a few questions about the magical plant of cannabis. While some of them embrace the plant, others have a very different opinion on it—we’re looking at you Cookie and Zoey.

This advice column is not for the faint of of heart, as the Sluts have very strong opinions.

Hey Sluts, I am new to trying pot. Should I start with edibles or should go old fashion and smoke it?
Kay: I prefer the cream, and rub it all over.
Cookie: Go old fashioned. There is nothing like holding onto that big fatty and sealing it with your tongue. Licking its length and then finishing it off while putting the whole thing in your mouth. (Did I just roll a joint or give head?)
Zoey: Go for the edibles; this way you don’t stink like a hippie from the 70s.
Jack-Lynn: Brownies are not good once they are burnt.
Cherri: I suck on everything, so I would say old school. Or lollipop.

Hey Sluts, I have neighbors that just moved here from a state where cannabis is not legal. What should I do with them?
Kay: Go on the Coors tour.
Cookie: Why didn’t they move to California?
Zoey: Bring them to our Charity Bingo every second Friday for cocktails and laughs.
Jack-Lynn: Lock them in the basement with nothing else to consume except the cannabis; then they will be converted.
Cherri: Get them high and tell them the cops are at the door.

Hey Sluts, where is a good place to spend 420?
Kay:For a free contact high—somewhere near Civic Center Park. For Sanity—as far away from Civic Center Park as possible.
Cookie: Anywhere but downtown or Boulder.
Zoey: At the dollar store. You can get four beautiful things and pay the taxes.
Jack-Lynn: One good night with the sluts will cost you about that much, and all the money goes to charity.
Cherri: In the mountains watching a cloud rise from downtown Denver.

Hey Sluts, what advice do you have for people who smoke too much pot?
Kay:Put down the bong slowly and step away from it. You are getting broke and fat.
Cookie: Going through life high and stupid is not a goal one should achieve.
Zoey: Take a long shower, and then spray yourself with febreze.
Jack-Lynn: Smoking as a general rule is bad for you. Mix up some brownies and consume it; be careful not to burn them (see answer to question one).
Cherri:Don’t forget to share.

Hey Sluts, why is pot such a big deal?
Kay: Is it? Is it really?
Cookie: It’s not, unless you are a jerk about. Not everyone wants to smell that you are high. Eat a cookie!
Zoey: It isn’t.
Jack-Lynn: In Colorado right now the prices for housing are sky high; many people do not have a pot to piss in or a window to throw it out of. Watch out for pedestrians.
Cherri: Nevermind pot; this is Colorado; it’s everywhere; I just need a lighter.

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